Bleach employment agency

[lainchan]

So what if they all got sacked as shinigami and arrancars and got sent to live on earth and fend for themselves? What jobs would they do to keep food on the table?

I think Yumichika would be some kind of beauty therapist or a stylist to the stars.

Rukia would attempt to break into the manga industry, get rejected, and move onto an acting career.

For some reason I can imagine Kenpachi and Grimmjow working in a butchers together and having daily battles with the various sharp implements around them.

What do you think?

[krompt]

Yeah Rukia will try to draw her own manga series, which fails horribly. Ulquiorra creates a world wide Glee club and Byakuya will becoma a male model >.>

[Rain]

Zaraki as either a UFC fighter or bounty Hunter for sure.

For some reason i see Ulquiorra as a therapist. I can picture him siting in a chair saying "and then what happened."

I will think of more later.

[Jhaxe]

@Rain - Ulqui therapist = win! XD

Let's see, Renji would work in a Barber shop =D (or a tatoo shop),
Gin would be in the realty business,
Stark would work at a coffee shop,
Halibel would be in the modeling industry,
Tousen would be a motivation speaker! XD
Grimmjow would work in the construction industry

Hinamori would work at girl's clothing store,
Matsumoto would work in a make-up shop,
Ikkaku would be a kendo teacher,
Yumichika would be a fashion consultant
Shunsui would be an sake critic XD
Ukitake would be an elementary school teacher
Unohana would be well...a doctor XD

Okay...I've said enough XD

[Gintoki]

Chad - Rhetorician
Yoruichi - Definitely PLAYMATE
Grimmjow - Job, wtf? No need for, he'll raid the streets and steal the money to survive.
Yamamoto - Forget him, he's already in Pension.
Unohana - Doctor

[Rain]

@Gintoki- Yoruichi as a Playmate- perfect

Grimmjow- rapper

Tousen- Criminal Justice/Attorney- i can see him using "righteous" as a defense alot.

[Jhaxe]

@Rain- I can see Tousen as a motivation speaker...ya' know? Every line would involve justice....

"And if you believe in the higher way to justice,
then your soul will finally be at peace,
and at last, you will understand true justice...
Righteous." XD

[Rain]

@jhaxe- motivational speaker does make sense

Soifon- she'd be Judge Judy, she's angry enough.

[ezxx]

Mayuri = assassin
Kenpachi = Gangster
Yoruichi = an idol
Urahra = an actor
Yamamoto = a Judge
Byakuya = a lawyer
Soi Fon = a wrestler
Ukitake = a librarian
Shunsui = a gardener
Aizen = a magician


Grimmjow = a serial killer
Ulquiorra = a professor
Halibel = an idol

[Griffith]

Shinji = a musician/pimp, and is a writer on how to pick up chicks.

[Riekie]

Grimmjow-Assasin..he'll do it for free as well;)
Ikkaku-karate teacher
Gin-sneaky pokerplayer
Tousen-Judge
Szayel-Experimenter in shady lab.

[Sarada]

Grimmjow-Assasin..he'll do it for free as well

Did you ever see 'The Jackal'?

That'd be Grimmy.

[Velius]

Nanao - The Librarian.

Ikkaku - Professional bull rider.

Yachiru - Babysitter.

Nemu - Therapist.

Matsumoto - None. LOL.

Hitsugaya - Researcher. :cool:

Ukitake - Icecream truck driver.

Mayuri - Professional Clown. lmao.

More to come.

[Kibou_chin]

Yamamoto = a Judge

xD Now that I think about it, he does resemble the Judge in Pheonix Wright. lol.

[Rain]

Renji (or squad 8's 3rd seat) as a pro-wrestler.

Gin as a poker player is perfect.

Halibel, Yoruichi, Matsumoto and Soifon in a bleach version of the view

[Gintoki]

Gin's a snake tamer in a circus, and Yammy's the new Yokozuna of the Sumo Wrestlers.

[Rain]

Yammy as a luchador (mexican wrestler) would be hilarious.

[Shannon]

Ulquiorra shall be a psychiatrist!

Ulquiorra: "So... how do you feel about this?"
Customer: "Well, I, uhh..."
Ulquiorra: "I don't care."

And... Uhh... Tousen should be an acupuncture therapist, with all the needle poking.

Tousen: "Does it hurt now?"
Customer:"... yes?"
Tousen: "Good."

[Rain]

This would make a great spin-off manga. Kubo should write this, it'd be awesome.


For some I just got the thought of Hitsugaya as ex. pres. Clinton during the whole scandle thing. Think about it, you can't not laugh.

[Jhaxe]

I love thinkin' of Gin as a realty agent. XD

Gin- "Do you like this house?" Smile.
Person- "Well...I don't really think..."
Gin-"Are you sure?" Wider smile.
Person-"Uh...um...." twitches.
Gin-"I could always show you another house" gets closer and smiles.
Person-*faints*
Gin-"I'll take that as a yes" -^^-

[kiri]

Gin- a joker

*laughs* i agree with you Jhaxe, I will faint if I found one realtor like that!!! xD

[Unicorn]

ROFL Jhaxe... I can totally see Gin acting like that...

Matsumoto - Public relations / owner of a beauty therapy shop.

Yumichika - hairstylist-to-the-stars.

Kenpachi - Construction business - specialist in demolition.

Byakuya - property tycoon / hotel or casino supremo.

Soifong - Head of CIA

Shunsui - opens a bar.

Ukitake - retires to the countryside and maybe starts a vineyard.

Nanao - Supremo boss of any Government Department of Finance

Nemu - Personal Assistant

Mayuri - Military scientist (designing things that go boom in creative ways)

[ezxx]

My list continued

Yami - a stand up comedian
Gin - an artist
Lisa - a pornstar
Noitora - an archaeologist
Ikkaku - an accountant
Orihime - Royalty, a Queen
Edurado - a Geologist
Shawlong - a barber
Tousen - a pet store owner
Tessai - manager of a club
Chad - an astronaut

[Llama]

Aizen - Becomes Secretary of State. But is secretly the mastermind behind the biggest and most dangerous terrorist organization. Fakes his death. Kills everyone in the White house and steals the nuke codes.

Gin - The Spokesman of the House. Kills everyone in the Congress and sets off a bomb in the Pentagon.

Tousen - A judge in the Supreme Court. Kills everyone in the Supreme Court.

Helicopters then come and pick them up and they make it back safely to their secret base. They then wage World War 3 on the World.

[Velius]

Llama those are some very violent 'jobs'. lol. Why does it always have to end in mass destruction?! :D

[Llama]

Human nature my good friend, human nature. If I had it my way though, peace and love!

[Velius]

I guess, but wouldn't it be ok for Aizen to have a nice desk job in an office somewhere and not kill everyone at the end of a days work?! I think it's possible. ;)

[Llama]

Possible but unlikely. Aizen and world domination just go hand in hand.

[Velius]

Yea, but this thread isn't 'how would they take over the world', it's what kind of normal day to day jobs would they have. Your ideas are pretty good, less the mass killing that is. :)

[Llama]

Lol, fine. They can have those jobs, without the massacre.

[Shannon]

I can imagine Aizen being the new Martha Stewart, but that's me. :P

EDIT: ZOMG, unlucky post.

[StarryInoueSky]

LOL! Llama!

Grimmjow: Works at the Zoo. He is stationed in the feline department watching and talking to the kitties! Reowr!

Ulquiorra: Works at Starbucks. (Yeah, I've been reading RenegadeRaine's fic. XD) Actually spits in the tea and coffee of spoiled rich brats.

Noitora: Tattoo Parlor.

Halibel: Strip joint.

Nanao: Secretary having an affair with the president of a sake company.

Shunsui: President of a sake company.

Ukitake: Kindergarten teacher.

Mayuri: Sex Education professor in College.

Nemu: Teacher assistant for Mayuri and demonstration tool.

Byakuya: Works at a mens department store in a expensive store.

Renji: Hawaiin shirt advertisement model.

Rukia: Author of children's book with pictures!

Tatsuki: World Boxing Champion

Chizuru: Owner of the words first Lezbian Play Girl magazine and the Heff of the Lez's.

Ishida: Clothing designer.

Chad: Owns a pet shop.

Aizen: Works at a Day Care.

Hinamori: Assistant Nurse

Hitsugaya: Child Star

Matsumoto: Beer commercial actress and actress in movies.

Gin: Limo driver.. especially Matsumoto's... Gotta keep an eye on her and her crazy fans.

Kon: King of Stuffed animals in the toy department.

I think that's it for now...

[Rain]

@StarryInoueSky- if anyone is going to be a sex ed profesor it better be Yoruichi. It'd be the Best class ever.:D

[StarryInoueSky]

@StarryInoueSky- if anyone is going to be a sex ed profesor it better be Yoruichi. It'd be the Best class ever.:D

LOL! That's so true.

[Gothic Lolita]

Yoruichi : *what rain said* .. i would soo BEE in that class XD

Byakuya: King of a very known country. <3 :love

Matsumoto: spokes person on TV, and anchor woman.

Gin: Horror movie director with him always being the killer or villin .. dont mind staring in his movies :love

Kuukaku: terrorist XD .... and her bombs then become fire works when they explode !! XD so cool

Soifong: founder of the most tastiest honey in jar ever produced by bees. aww =3

Ulquiorra: Abercrombie model for some magazine :love ... and i would soo subscribe to it !

Grimmjow: General at army, yelling at boys to march faster XD

Nanao: librarian

Shunsui: owner of the hottest bar in town.

Ukitake: a personal adviser to the president .. that would be soo cool :yay

Mayuri: Doctor, showing interns whats inside the human body with out really giving them much education. he jst wants to touch the organs XD then give REALLY hard questions about it and that it was all educational :rofl

Nemu: Mayuri's personal secretary

Renji: Rock star ... with all those sexy tattoos and the wild hair, he soo has to be :rolleyes:

Rukia: works in manga and novels publishing. doing covers XD

Ishida: owns a designer brand store and works along side Mayuri at his dad's hospital

Aizen: Him, Antonio Banderaz star in movies together XD ... Zorro 3 .. kyaaa~ :3

Hinamori: and Aizen groupie XD

Hitsugaya: Child prodigy pianist .. nyuu~ XD

[Riekie]

@ Sarada: I soo love that movie with Bruce being the villian! I can totally see Grimmjow do that! *kyaaa*

especially when he shoots the woman and stays by her side to tell her that she only has 15 minutes left because her liver got messed up:D Ahh Grimmjow and torture go hand in handXD

Renji: Surfer and works at a beach club and late night job is working for the CIA.
Sado: Rescues abandoned kitties and other animals.
Ishida: Tailor
Orihime: housewife
Ichigo: Lawyer hahaha
Yuzu: Doctor
Karin: P.E. teacher

[Rain]

Komamura- zoo animal, the real world is too afraid of him:(

Iba- gangster

Yoruichi- nothing (people would just give her money if she asked:D)

[lainchan]

Lol! These are great XD

Now that I think about I could imagine Matsumoto owning a bar where they all relaxed after their hard days at work.
She'd be a very drunk bar maid though XD

[Rain]

Althought it wouldn't fit him at all I want to see GJ working at the DMV or at a bank or something. I can't imagine how hilarious this could be.

[Llama]

Aizen would run a corporation and be a multi-billionaire. He would then start a show called "The Espada."

[Velius]

Aizen would run a corporation and be a multi-billionaire. He would then start a show called "The Espada."
LMAO. That's classic. :D

Some more:

Zaraki - Wrecking Ball Operator.

Byakuya - Bank President.

Yumichika -Hair Stylist.

Soi Fong - Female Prision Warden. lol.

Oomeda - Cook.

More to come.

[Gothic Lolita]

Soi Fong - Female Prision Warden. lol.

LMFAO ... aside from my idea .. that one is pretty funny XD .. noice one hehe

[speedphantom]

Yama-ji, well the obvious one is headmaster/principal. WWE wrestler I says haha XD. He'd be like a super buff dude and older and beardier!

Isshin reminds me of those tv chefs with the weird personalities haha:p.

Tessai seems like a bouncer or body guard kinda guy. He'd be a teacher for something or rather.

Kira - http://images.jupiterimages.com/common/detail/33/45/23424533.jpg

[Kibou_chin]

Soi Fon - A plushie designer
Isane - A nun... =O
Nemu - A mute interpreter (if thats what you call em)
Momo - a rag doll
Kira - He'd be singing in a bar every day songs about how depressed he is because his captains gone.
Renji - In a zoo... with monkeys x3
Iba- A yakuza xD
Kenpachi - He'd be working all through dcember singing Xmas carols
Yachiru - A candy store owner but shed run out of business for eating all the candy
Gin - A stand up comedian XD

Tis all I got for now x3

[spacecat]

Soi Fong as prison warden is spot on lolz.
Byakuya would be the queen of spain, Renji would be a surf life saver or something and Urahara would stand behind the counter of the local book shop which has the secret pron section upstairs that only random ppl seem to know about.

[Kalua]

Aizen: Him, Antonio Banderaz star in movies together XD ... Zorro 3 .. kyaaa~ :3



Best movie ever. XD

Gin and Urahara would start a modeling agency with Matsumoto, Yoruichi, Halibel, and Yachiru being their first models.

GJ and Kenpachi would be personal fitness Trainers.

And Ishida would be a househusband. <3

[ZarakiKenpachi]

kenpachi would be a stay at home dad for Yachiru

[laurie b.]

This is amusing. Let's see...

Matsumoto - Ren Faire bar maid/wench
Urahara - famous personal trainer, the type that owns a string of gyms worldwide
Chad - rock star (bassist)
Renji - in the same band as Chad (lead singer)
Tessai - their bodyguard
Yumichika - personal shopper
Yachiru - child star with her own reality TV show
Kenpachi - pro-wrestler
Hitsugaya - an incredibly short CSI
Ishida - coroner
Aizen - postal worker
Ukitake - psychiatrist
Byakuya - Donald Trump with better hair
Rukia - interior designer
Grimmjow - reality TV nature show host (he's wild, baby)
Ichigo - war photojournalist

[Riekie]

Laurie B: Kyaaa at the Byakuya and Grimmjow one:D

Lemme try it again:

Grimmjow- Head of the Yakuza (no one orders him around)
Sado- Veterinarian
Nel- Ichigo's personal bodyguard
Nnoitra- Hitman or tattoo modifier
Ulquiorra- servant
Halibel- Amazon
Stark- sleeps on mattresses to show it's comfort
Moe aka dark Espada- Yoga teacher/ relaxation therapist
Aaro y Niro- Gumballmachine
Yammi- wrestler
Szayel- personal stylist, mostly for himself though
Old Espada dude- Sailor

[Hiraeth]

You guys inspired me, I just wrote like 8 pages of my first Bleach fanfiction, making them all in showbusiness.

EDIT: When I find somewhere online to put it I'll post the link here.

[Riekie]

@Hiraeth: I've heard about a little place called fanfiction.net..maybe that's a try?

[Hiraeth]

Yeah but I have like two hours to wait before they let me post stuff seeing as I only just signed up. *grumbles* Plus it's 1 in the morning and I need sleep so I won't be staying up waiting for then.

Thanks anyhow!

EDIT: Make that two days! *massive sadface*

[Riekie]

Ahh like that:D sorry, didn't notice you are from Australia:D

btw..that sucks! how about Deviantart.com?

[Hiraeth]

Actually I was just thinking that.

EDIT: Yes! deviant art loves me!

[Riekie]

Hahaha glad it worked out:D soo..linkie linkiexD

[Hiraeth]

http://hiraeth.deviantart.com/art/Silver-Screen-Sensation-1-67550238

I'm very self conscious so I've only posted the first of 8 pages. If I get a good response I will post more.

EDIT: I know only a few characters have appeared so far, but I promise everyone from Yachiru to Nnoitra will appear at some point.

[inuygoku]

Dont worry at all. there are a few Jerks at FF.net but most people will either say they loved or give a suggestion to fix and from what i read it was very good.

[Velius]

After the recent fillers, I wanna see Ichgio and Rukia open up a babysitting agency. They would specialize in overzealous, spoiled brat control. :XD

[memopanda]

Weirdly, I have often wondered what the shinigami would do, if they lived on earth... :fu

Byakuya gets rich from the royalties for his "Seaweed Ambassador" brand (perhaps because of his photo printed with the label?) and lives in a big mansion with Rukia. She is dedicated to her "Chappy the Rabbit" series, but it is yet to become popular.

Renji becomes a rock star/model but is forced to quit by a lawsuit after a billboard of him posing semi-nude causes multiple road accidents. He currently lives in Byakuya's mansion, where he cooks to earn his keep. His secondary profession is "Rukia's number one fan".

Chad, Hisagi and Matsumoto replace Renji with Hitsugaya as a lead singer in their band. Kira writes their songs and their brand of "sexy emo" has become very popular. Hitsugaya and Matsumoto have started a trend for napping in the afternoon, while Chad is voted "World's Sexiest Man" three times in a row.

Yumichika becomes a model scout, albeit an unsuccessful one because he feels nobody compares to his own beauty. Therefore Ikkaku is his bodyguard to protect him from all the people he has insulted during his short career.

Aizen starts a chain restaurant called Taco Aizen which soon becomes the "god" of the catering industry. Tousen makes the recipes himself and Gin is the chain's mascot. The Espada are employees, and famous in their own right. In fact, 50% of the customers in the flagship Karakura store said they were there to see the badass chief cashier known as Yammy.

Orihime becomes a world-renowned food critic, thereby fulfilling her dream of tasting every food known to man. Her secret is that her favourite place to eat is actually Aizen's fast food place, mainly due to a very nice waiter there called Ulquiorra.

Mayuri researches biological weapons but accidentally comes across a cure for all diseases and wins the Nobel Peace Prize. Children everywhere are told to be "as kind and caring as Mayuri-sama" and send him flowers for his birthday.

Unohana gets into extreme sports (specialty: rock climbing) after seeing that mankind's health is in good hands. She steadily gains a reputation as a fearsome strongwoman and weight trainers everywhere buy her sports drink "Essence of Minazuki" to become like her.

Komamura is a motivational speaker, inspiring millions to "reveal their true selves" but also to "release their beasts within", leading to an unexpected cult following.

And Kenpachi becomes a nursery school teacher. 'Nuff said there.

[zerosquad]

LOL Those are great Memopanda. Imagine Kenpachi with 15 kids on his back.

Yamamoto - Most sought out martial arts guru in the world.
Yama's VC - Philosophy professor and teaches a local fencing class.

Soi-Fon - You guessed it. Female Prison Warden.
Oomeda - Bodyguard outside of a VIP club.

Gin - being evil.
Kira - Disgruntled poet.

Unohana - Real Estate Agent / Home Decorator
Isane - Registered Nurse at local hospital / Music Therapist

Aizen - High School Councellor / Head of Golf/Chess Club *after school activities*
Hinamori - You guessed it. Follows Aizens every word.

Byakuya - Something in big business. Stocks, Investment etc.
Renji - Former Tatoo Artist. Tour's in Sado's rock band The Karakuras.

Shinsui - Owns Bar, enjoys listening to other's problems, constantly hitting on the women that stop by.
Nanao - Byakuya's apprentice.

Kommamura - (hard to beat Motivational Speaker)
Iba - Opened up a bar to compete with Shinsui.

Tousen - Writer renouned magazine. Fired because articles started much contraversy directed his goverment.
Tousen VC (cant think of name) - Takes over Renji's Tattoo parlor when he left to tour with The Karakuras.

Hitsugaya - Teen Nickolodean star.
Matsmoto - Hitsugaya's agent.

Kenpachi - (cant beat kindergarden teacher)
Yachiru - Kenny's fav student lol.
Ikkaku - Military Drill Sargent.
Yamichika - Fashion Designer.

Mayuri - Evil villan in a series of hit movie sensations.
Nemu - Dunno

Ukitake - Zen Buddhist, author, and holds classes in mansion on meditation, and herbal healing.
Ukitake's VCs - Dunno

This is alot of fun LOL.